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Keywords: transvestite, tranny, transgender, cross dresser, Los Angeles, Orange County, MTF
Updated June 8th, 2008
Write to Danielle and comment on her ideas why we do this.
There is nothing here but some pictures of me and some stories about why I do it. No sexy pictures. If you're looking for penis shots, please go somewhere else. I think you already know what a penis looks like and you don't need to see mine. Besides I think mine looks better than 90% of the ones I've seen on the net.
There is nothing on this site I would not let my daughter see. In fact nothing she has not seen or known about since she was 16. But then, she is a sex education columnist for a webzine with over 1,000,000 daily readers.
Please excuse the basic html. I think you're here for the content and not to see what sort of fancy Java tricks I can do. Nothing fancy here, just fast loading pages that won't crash your computer.
Welcome to the page of Danielle. I am a pre-op, slowly transitioning
MTF transsexual.
About Danielle:
Danielle is not some "sexy young thing". The picture here is a 50 something Danielle, taken in 2008, who is comfirtable as a woman. Danielle is also comfortable living by herself though she would investigate a long term relationship if an opportunity for one came along. As long it is understood that Danielle does not engage in rsiky behavior. She is not looking for sexual encounters. But if you're looking for a worldwise friend in Southern California, one who knows both sides of the gender divide very well and who can hold an intelligent conversation on any subject.
The years when Danielle could have been sexy are so far into her past they are becoming lost in the mists of pre-history. Danielle could be an executive secretary or maybe a small business owner, possibly an Orange County housewife with her childbearing years well behind her, the children grown up and moved away.. She likes to look good but sexy is not in the cards. She's on her feet a lot so she likes comfortable clothes and especially comfortable shoes. And even though Danielle tries to keep in shape and take care of self, in her youth, Danielle, like many of us had a few too many pizzas and too little exercise, so she longer has her girlish figure. The picture of Danielle with shorter red hair is just after a makeover in 2003 at the now defunct Pink Book in West Hollywood. Before her own hair grew out long enough to be seen in public. This is her very first picture as a passable female. There are a lot more pictures on the following pages.
While I have had gender identity issues since I was about 5 years old, I've been out of the closet since July 2003. At that time my personal life allowed me to try something I was waiting all my life to try. To come out to the world as the woman I always felt I was. I am still not all the way there but I no longer live as a male. Though I still sometimes do some typical male things. Like pull the head on my car in 2005 to change the head gasket. And the funny thing is that the person helping and who I borrowed a torque wrench from is also an MTF transsexual who is farther along than me. Thanks Ronnie
It was that summer when I fulfilled a dream I had at a much younger age. A long time ago I had a dream of dumping off all my male clothes at the Salvation Army. I did it that summer. Thanks to EBay, thrift stores and places like Ross I stocked up with women’s clothing and have not worn anything else since July 2003. Even to work, I just wear “mannish” women’s clothing to maintain an androgynous look. It is interesting how much “mannish” women’s clothing there is available out there. I have no trouble appearing as what some assume to be a male at work, a female other times or anything in between. More and more often, even when I am not trying to pass as a female, I get called “ma’am”. Like at my daughter’s undergrad graduation
Anyway, back to my story. At that time I was not sure if I was a transsexual or just your run of the mill, dedicated cross dresser. I joined the Alpha Chapter of Tri-Ess International. I had not realized at the time that this was the original chapter, the longest running support group in the world for cross dressers. My daughter even went to the meetings with me in Burbank.
I was wearing wigs at that time when I went out en femme. However, at that time I let my hair grow out and changed my hair coloring from Medium Brown to Hollywood Blonde. It took until late 2005 until I was able to stop wearing wigs. I go to work with a pony tail. Later in 2003 I also joined a twice weekly group in Orange County called Being Me. This group is more for transsexuals. Some members, including the facilitator, have already had surgery and I have known several who had it since them. They meet twice a month in Garden Grove.
The following summer, in July 2004 my daughter went off to college. So then, I was a free man, er girl or .. whatever. You know what I mean.
In July 2006, when I was just about to turn 55, I decided it was now or never to go further on this path. Since I had already proven I could mingle in society as a woman by this time, I consulted what some consider to be the finest endocrinologist in the Los Angeles area. One who is highly experienced in turning men into women. I first met Dr. ODea when he came to a meeting of the Tri-Ess group in Los Angeles. I received advice from him there that led to my daughter being completely cured of life threatening issues caused by the drugs she was taking for reproductive problems.
I started in July 2006 on a conservative program of hormone pellet insertion every 4 months. As well, I started to see an electrologist and started to have my facial hair removed. As of May 2008, I am about a “A” cup and about 2/3 of my facial hair is gone, including almost all of the dark ones. Pretty well the entire face except the area under my chin. The rest of my face is clear enough I can almost pass even I do not shave that day. And yes, it hurts.
As well, my body hair is down about 90%. I was previously quite a monkey in that area. My skin is softer and I have an overall better feeling of well-being. Over the past years, I moved from being a closet cross dresser to actually being a transitioning trans-gender person. I am going slow on the transition and will not likely be all the way to living full time as a woman until some time after my daughter finishes grad school in mid 2010. Though by having no male clothing at all and with breasts showing all the time and showing many outward female characteristics, some may say I am doing so already. While I have not “come out” at work I have dropped enough hints with the company gossips that something is up. While at work I wear pants, these are always women’s pants and most do not have front zippers. I wear shirts that button up opposite from men’s shirts and I have long blond hair that I put in a ponytail. Though I actually have to wear a bra I seldom wear make up to work and I just let those at work just think what they want. So far everyone seems to have taken things very well. While I do not think I am irreplaceable, maybe it has something to do that products I have designed are something like 20% of the entire company’s sales and many of their jobs depend on me being creative. And by being a little unusual, maybe they accept that as part of being creative?
As for the original cross dressing and now starting transition, I have
no idea what makes we want to do it. My life has been well organized (OK,
so my housekeeping sucks) and quiet. There's just something in my makeup
that keeps me feeling that this is a good thing to do, an OK thing to do
and that there is nothing wrong in joining the 50% of the population who
cross dress now (the women). Harmless to no one and if I do get exposed
in public, embarrassing to no one but me. However, as a long time
Los Angelino I know that this is not seen as all that extreme an activity
by my fellow citizens of that weird and wacky world we call "The Southland".
You may think of this is a fetish but I have found something I always suspected. Women’s clothing fits me better. I always used to have trouble finding men’s pants and shirts that fit. For decades I concluded that unless I wasted to get my clothes tailored, that clothes were just not meant to fit properly. I find I am a perfect 18WP or 18W short in my pant’s size and size XL women’s shirts fit my proportions far better that I ever had a man’s shirt fit me. It seems my whole upper skeletal structure is closer to w woman’s typical proportion than a man’s. I now have pants (and skirts) that fit me perfectly and don’t fall down even without a belt or any extra help. I am wondering if this having mixed male and female proportions has anything to do with my need to do this. By the way, I do not have an Adams Apple either. My throat is as smooth as any woman’s.
The big question is whether Danielle will some day have SRS. As Danielle has a handicap that makes getting up from the toilet difficult the likelihood is low. Do I need to spell it out further? Otherwise Danielle would do it as soon as her daughter finished her grad degree. Even though I have found gadgets that which let women pee standing up. My daughter has two different ones of these.
I also regularly attend two support groups. Alpha Tri-Ess is primarily concerned with helping heterosexual cross dressers. It is the oldest trans support group in the world, being founded in the early 1960s by Virginia Prince, who I have met several times and who is credited with being the person who invented the term “transgender”. Many other support groups have branched off from this founding chapter. They meet the second Saturday of every month in Burbank, California. The meetings take the form of a nice dinner party and there is usually a guest of honor who speaks on some issue of interest to the membership. The group charges a small fee to cover the cost of renting hotel room so those who cannot change at home or who are not yet confident enough to appear in public can dress there. The members generally dress elegantly, in age appropriate clothing.
The other group I regularly attend is Being Me, oriented more
for those in transition or thinking of transitioning. The regular facilitator
and several other regulars are “post-op”. They meet in Garden Grove, California
in Orange County. Being Me, is a peer discussion group that confronts issues
that are important for any Transgender person or a loved one to understand
about themselves. Being Me is a transition group as well as a group that
deals with inner development of the person that allows and encourages self
exploration during the transition journey. You can find more information
at: http://www.octcca.org/beingme.htm. Being Me meets every first and third
Friday of the month at 7:30pm.
About My Other Identity:
I'm a 50+ human creature who spends much of their time as an androgynous
sort of person with long blonde hair and a ponytail, where many who see
me assume I am a male. Though I sometimes get “looks” from men when they
see me in the men’s room. On weekends though, Danielle presents pretty
well only as a female.
However, I am not sure if this has turned into a complex, a fetish or something as I can no longer bring myself to wear any clothing that is a men's item. Sometimes a unisex thing like a T-shirt but not all that often. Everything I wear must be made for women or if it seems unisex, the size tag must be women's sizing. I see this as even a bit unusual for a cross dresser. Most crossdressers and even transitioning transgender people I know, when in boy mode, wear clothes meant for men. One or the other. None of wearing one while passing off as the other. Its just that I have found the cut of most women’s clothes seem to fit me better. Men’s clothes never fit me well as by body proportions are not typically male. I am wider at the hips than the waist. I have narrow, sloped shoulders and no Adams Apple. I seem to be shaped more like a woman than an man. Is this grasping at straws as a justification? Maybe. I don’t know for sure.
I'm living alone now and I have taken the plunge and come out of the closet and I am trying to learn how to do this right. I do it pretty good and I have not knowingly been “read” or “clocked” since about a month after I came out. Have a look at my picture to the left taken in April 2008. My own hair, my own makeup and having no trouble passing anywhere as a mature woman in her 50s.
Click here for some insight why I do this
As with all these tranny sites, construction will be ongoing, I promise to have the pix well cropped and resampled so the files are not too big and so I can post lots and lots of them.
If you're a T-girl in greater the Los Angeles area or visiting LA, send me a message here. I'd love to hear from you
Please note I am not looking for sex or show off my privates. Just to
have fun going out as a woman in this great city of Los Angeles.
Links
Danielle's Cross Dressing Hints
Created July 7, 2003
Revised October 23, 2005